It's not you, it's me...

So next year will mark the 10 year anniversary of my home game, Pepper Street Poker.

As you likely know, if you peruse the blog over there, I host a monthly multi-table tournament.  The buy in is $40 and it's a very social, very friendly gathering of chums & chums of chums that typically sees about 20 people playing for about 6 hours for a $300 top prize and a trophy and a picture on the wall and a seat in the Tournament of Champions.

All in all a fun time, and a grand time.  Grander I'd say than probably 90% of all home poker games.

I've had a blast hosting it, and goodness knows I've also had great results, especially lately.  This year alone I've won 3 tournaments out of 10, and also finished second twice, and both of those times the hour was late and I managed to negotiate an even money chop in exchange for a seat that I already had locked up.   I also made these deals truthfully, for the health of the game, as I don't think winning nearly half of my own tournaments looks that great.

Anyways, I've always enjoyed hosting, it has it's own rewards beyond just playing cards.  But it is a lot of work.   A lot of work.

Set up begins around 1 or 2pm on Saturday, at the latest.  Because it's multiple tables, with typically around 20 players coming, it means I have to set up 3 tables just in case I get last minute extra players.  Then there's the chips, cards, buttons, snack tables etc.  Plus I usually use a leaf blower to clean out the garage first.    And then I also go to the store for snacks.  All told, with this trip included, set up at a pace that isn't frantic is at least 3 hours.

And then sometimes it's too hot to play in the garage, so I have to set up on the patio, which adds another hour.

Anyways, I'm not complaining really - I've always enjoyed these duties, and the reward of hosting a game that everyone loves has been more than worth it.

But lately, when it comes to poker,  my mind has been on a bit of a wanderlust; that is, as the game in my garage goes on, so too does the game at large; and increasingly that's where my thoughts and body go.

I've recognized over the past few years, that poker is much larger than my little monthly Saturday night party.  I've been hosting these big tournaments because I enjoy it, but also because I felt in the past that if I didn't, I wouldn't be playing too much poker.

These days, I average one Sunday a month at the Bike or Commerce, in their daily tournament; I also take time every other week during the week to go to a home game in North Hollywood or Garner's game out near Culver City.    So were my game to disappear entirely, I would still be playing a substantial amount.

With this in mind, I lately have been asking myself - is the work and time I put in to hosting a big monthly multi-table tournament worth it?  Looking at this with total honesty and transparency I can say there are for sure pros and cons.

PROS:

-  I have a roster of over 70 players, 2/3 of which make it out at least once a year and 1/3 of which make it almost every month.   They love the game, and by and large they are all nice people.

-  I take a lot of pride in running the best home poker game that I've ever played in; I've played in some lovely home games, but none even come close to the level of organization and finesse that mine has.

-  There is at this point, a rather long history of this game.  A perpetual plaque on the wall has six names for player of the year over the better part of the past decade; even before things got all official, we've been playing in this garage for almost 10 years.  I would hate to see that simply up and vanish.


But then there are a few cons -


CONS:

 -  I increasingly look at my game as more of an obligation than something I enjoy.  I'd say the ratio is now 60/40 obligation to enjoyment.  It used to be about 80/20 in the reverse.  This is because of two things...

-  Longtime players that I'd grown quite fond of, are no longer playing.  Some have moved away, some have moved on to other things, and even a couple have left this earth.   Most notably one of the rocks (not rock as in tight player, but rock as in reliably always at the game and a great guy) recently had a blow up with another player and now refuses to show up when he does.   Another huge rock just moved to Florida.   So now I don't have them, and they've been replaced with younger and perfectly nice people, but not people that I have a decade long friendship with.  Honestly, it's been tough because I didn't realize how much I enjoyed the social aspect of the game until some of my best buds were gone.

-  I have a never ending hunger to improve my game and get good results out in the wild (in card rooms and casinos) and I don't know if the game in my garage with randoms who often are terrible players (though lovely people) is doing my game more harm than good.   It does boost my confidence  somewhat to beat up on other players who think they're hot shit but really are just toddlers in the game, but that's about the only positive thing.  And really, it's not that positive.  These are nice folks that I barely know, and it doesn't help my heart very much to run them over - I'd much rather pummel fish in a casino, not nice kids who just want to enjoy their evening.



Ultimately though, I can come up with a list of good and bad things about the monthly tournaments in my garage, but it really boils down to one question -  "Is hosting this game going to get me closer to my goal?"

What is my goal?  Well it hit me last night light a bolt of lighting - so hard that I shot up off of the couch.

I was watching the Main Event of the WSOP, thinking about how much I admired the guys around the featured table and thinking to myself - they're very good, because they play every day, I may never be that good; but I'm certainly capable of it.  I really know I can do it - within the framework of my life that I love.  I can be there some day.

And so that's it - I have to make this decision about my Saturday game, keep it the same or take a break - based on my one goal; the goal of succeeding in large poker tournaments.   There's good things about it, maybe more good things than bad things, but that's not material.  What matters ultimately is this one question and my one desire.

Here's exactly what I want - I've cashed for 1, 2 even 3 thousand dollars before.  I'm really aiming to the upper four figures or even five figures.   I've got the $2700 thing, now I'm ready for the $8000 thing or even the $17,000 thing or yes, maybe even the $43,000 thing.

I know I can do it, with more serious play under my belt - and the Saturday tournament in my garage, lovely as it it, is not serious play.


So, Saturday tournament, this is the truth - it's not you, it's me.

We only get one life, so I have to use it with me in mind, and in this case, I'm going to give up my Saturday tournament hosting duties for awhile - to concentrate on me and what I want.   To drastically improve my game and to see big results in a large (for me) buy-in tournament.

To this end, I still very much plan to keep playing poker in my garage.

Rather than a big elaborate multi-table event once a month on a Saturday that takes up 4 hours of set-up and 7 hours of playing, I think I will be much better served by hosting a very simple one table poker night that takes 10 minutes to set up and that happens during the week.

The plan is to come home from work, pull up in my driveway around 6:30, open the garage door, plop open a table, drag some chairs over, then pull out the cards and chips (which will already be set up to hand out in stacks) and then go inside and have a nice dinner.   I'll return at 7:25 to sit down and welcome players at the table, take their monies, punch up the tournament software on my i-pad and start.

Water will already be in the cooler, nuts and bowls on the shelf.   Music will be via my i-phone and jbl charge.  No preparation for anything else.

I'd love for this to happen every other Wednesday night.   Every 3 or 4 tournaments or so, we'll break it up with a low stakes cash game or maybe even a tournament different from NLHE such as Omaha/8 or HORSE.

I realize that I very well may be killing the golden goose here, no doubt I will lose quite a few players, hopefully not too many regulars.   It would be a shame to not be able to have a full table every week, but I'm prepared to live with it, or even potentially the loss of my game entire.

My poker education has to come first, and I have no doubt that I will get LOADS more benefit in hosting a bi-weekly single table full of folks that I know well and whose games I respect and who I can talk poker with during and after.

I wrote up a whole post, similar to this one but maybe not quite so revealing, and was going to post it on the Pepper Street blog as an announcement that the Saturday tournaments were coming to an end, but now I think I'll just shorten the post tremendously, leaving out explanations and simply stating that we're on a break from the Saturday MTT's.    People in general, unless they are my close friends, don't really give a shit why things are changing and really, I don't blame them.

So, that's why I have this post here.  It feels good to really articulate why this change has come about.

In the end, if my game does implode, it won't be the end of the world.  I have a couple of nice home games that I can always attend - and there's always the Bike and Commerce with their low cost dailies that are great venues for working hard and seriously on my game.  Best of all, no bruised egos and no hurt feelings - at least on my end or with people that I am familiar with and also trying to entertain and host.   I think my game will get better when I can leave the hosting duties to the professionals - and those hosting duties that I do take on are much less taxing.


I'm excited about this big change in my poker life, I like that I am choosing to focus more on the game and learning from my good friends; I am relieved that I don't have such a large obligation to entertain entirely on my shoulders anymore.   Can't wait for next year to start!


EDIT / ADDENDUM

I never rush into big decisions like this and change things immediately,  I like to 'sleep on it' so to speak - give myself time to think about and mentally digest.  Writing about a big decision is one form of this digestion, and after writing the above, I'm having a bit of a change of heart.

I still want to cut way down on the Saturday tournament, but doing away with it entirely seems a bit too much.  As I said above, there is a history here - a perpetual plaque on the wall and a legacy of sorts that I would hate to see vanish.

So my tentative plan right now, at least until I change my mind again, is to still throw Saturday night tournaments, probably once every two or three months or so - doubling the buy-in at least so people will feel it's worth coming out and playing for; and making it a biggish deal.   Stay tuned, I may change my mind yet again before the year is up.